Guilt & Shame

Guilt is a feeling you get when you did something wrong or think you did something wrong. Shame is a feeling that your whole self is wrong. Uncontrollable eating can cause feelings of both guilt and shame; guilty for actually overeating and shame for feeling broken. Ironically for the overeater, guilt and shame are often at the core of uncontrollable eating. Indulging in favorite foods seems to temporarily relieve the emotional pain caused by guilt and shame. In that moment of indulgence there is happiness, deliciousness, stimulated taste buds that send signals to the brain that everything is delightful. However seconds after pausing in a food binge remorse begins to set in, regret for overeating once again, a promise is made never to do such a thing again. The resulting guilt and shame labels certain foods "bad" and those same labels extend then to the overeater repeating the cycle of insanity. Remind yourself daily that you are not "bad" for having a problem. Everyone deserves happiness and freedom from food addictions. Stop feeding shame... say this with me today: "I can be happy, I can be healthy, I can be loved."

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

 

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Getting Started

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

 

 

Freedom of Choice

Somewhere lost between the insanity of food addiction or imprisoned to abstinence, is there freedom from overeating?

 

Without abstinence from our food addiction we are bound by the secrecies of binging, purging, hiding food and secretly eating but in abstinence we feel overly restricted, caged within boundaries of certain foods that long to be set free.

 

I think we find balance in a food plan that allows us any choice of food.  We have to tailor a plan that releases us from restrictions yet sets boundaries to help prevent overeating.  It is our goal then, to learn and grow, to train ourselves, teach our mind and body that there is a balance between food addiction and abstinence; a well-designed food plan can provide structure and keep us accountable.

 

But what about the chemical and psychological pieces of food addiction, can a food plan alone deal with those strong influences?  In conjunction with a food plan we need support.  The support of others where we can share our feelings, relate to others stories and begin to pave new paths in thinking about how we’ve used food for so many things other than nutrition. Support to explore some of our deepest secrets that keep us captive to food addiction psychologically and be able to bring those fears forward and release them forever.

 

Let’s not forget about ongoing education.  Educating ourselves in new ways of thinking, what we have believed about food has not worked for use in the past so now is the time with the structure of a food plan and the support of a group or individual that we release old ways of thinking and onboard new educational information.

 

Somewhere between lost in food addiction and the imprisonment of abstinence is a life we can claim but we will have to be open to change, remain supported, and be dedicated to a sound food plan.

 

When we falter we RESET and move FORWARD. 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

We Carry The Message Not The Body

“We share experience, strength and hope with each other’s.  What we don’t do, and should not do, is share one another’s burdens, whether financial or emotional.” – One Day at a Time/Al-Anon

 

Are you the “rescuer” who drops your own personal responsibilities to come to the aid of another?   It is very noble to consider others but you must care for yourself first.  Not that your life has to be in complete order for you to help others but there has to be balance in making sure your side of the street is clear before you cross to the other side to help another.

 

Are you overly invested in others?  Do you absorb yourself in caring for others to the point you aren’t caring for yourself?  We carry the message; experience, hope & strength, from the countless others who have come before us on our journey to better health, we never carry anything more.

 

Putting yourself first in assessing your needs is a very important part of our food, mind, body health. 

 

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

Enough

 

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

 

Notice: This message is intended solely for the use of the individual and entity to whom it is addressed, and may contain information that is privileged, confidential, and exempt from disclosure under applicable state and federal laws. If you are not the addressee, or are not authorized to receive for the intended addressee, you are hereby notified that you may not use, copy, distribute, or disclose to anyone this message or the information contained herein. If you have received this message in error, immediately advise the sender by reply email and destroy this message.

 

 

ABC's

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

 

Notice: This message is intended solely for the use of the individual and entity to whom it is addressed, and may contain information that is privileged, confidential, and exempt from disclosure under applicable state and federal laws. If you are not the addressee, or are not authorized to receive for the intended addressee, you are hereby notified that you may not use, copy, distribute, or disclose to anyone this message or the information contained herein. If you have received this message in error, immediately advise the sender by reply email and destroy this message.

 

 

Food is not an emotion

For many of us who overeat, food is connected to our emotions. We have learned to use food to medicate ourselves, hide our fears, celebrate our joy. Do we know what these emotions really feel like in our bodies without food?

 

When I say I'm stuffed have I buried something?

When I am introduced to a joyous moment and the first think I think of is cake, I know I have some work to do.

 

We are living life without acknowledging our feelings, what we’ve been experiencing is chocolate covered emotions.

 

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

 

Notice: This message is intended solely for the use of the individual and entity to whom it is addressed, and may contain information that is privileged, confidential, and exempt from disclosure under applicable state and federal laws. If you are not the addressee, or are not authorized to receive for the intended addressee, you are hereby notified that you may not use, copy, distribute, or disclose to anyone this message or the information contained herein. If you have received this message in error, immediately advise the sender by reply email and destroy this message.

 

 

Making Amends

Making amends. What is making amends anyway? One definition is to correct a mistake that created a bad situation. When we make amends it is not simply to say I'm sorry or apologizing. Instead we attempting to correct a mistake that created a bad situation. Most often this begins by embracing a complete change of attitude and behavior. Our amends are valid even if the other person does not respond. In making amends, we change our thinking from the path we were on that caused a shatter in the relationship. In this way we are able to purge ourselves of guilt and negative feelings. Forgiveness does not mean we lost the fight, it doesn't mean we agree with what happened, it is not saying we will forget what was said or done, but it IS the action of letting it go and moving forward.

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

Dieting vs Lifestyle

This isn’t not my first time losing weight.  I’ve been dieting all my life, I’ve lost hundreds of pounds but when the diet ended the weight returned. This time I’m not dieting, I’m fighting that “diet” mentality and replacing it with the question, “Can I do this way of eating forever?”  The answer for today is, YES I CAN!  I can live this new lifestyle of eating reasonable, healthy, best choices and strive for doing even better at my next meal.  What happens if I make a poor choice?  Each moment of my new way of living allows me to make the food best choices I can, if in a moment I make a choice that is considered poor maybe it’s because it’s the best I could do at that moment.  But does that mean I quit and go back to my old ways?  Of course not!  Each moment I choose to be better, do better, live better… that is MY choice – food has no power in gratitude!  In dieting I felt restricted, deprived, angry, different, and depressed.  In my new way of living I’m eating foods that feed my body and are nutritionally sound.  These choices make my body feel better and in that space I don’t need to overeat to get my “feel good fix”.  Eating and living life is full of ups and downs and so is my new way of living.  In the end, making the best food choices will result in weight loss, and allow me to live happier and healthier for today.

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET
support@forwardreset.com
http://forwardreset.com

 

 

If I Quit Now

 

If I quit now…. I WILL be back where I started.  I’m so grateful for where I am at in my journey.  Even though the path is filled with peaks and valleys it wasn’t long ago I was back at the beginning and desperately wishing to be where I am today.

 

Living life happier and healthier for today!

 

Steve Colbeth
FORWARD RESET

support@forwardreset.com

http://forwardreset.com

 

 

 

What's The Real Price?

 

Every bite, every lick, every taste, it has a price doesn’t it?  Maybe your are calorie counting to keep your weight under control, have you considered adding up your bites, tastes and licks?  If so, you know that these mindless food portions add up and sometimes quickly!

Do you finish your kids plates, consume the last of something in a pan, have a sample or two while out shopping, taste a spoonful of what you are cooking, what is the real price of these seemingly harmless portions of food?

 We often start out strong on our journey to eat healthier, to rid ourselves of unwanted pounds, and our diligence and hard work begin to show on the scale, and then we begin to discover something even greater, those non-scale rewards!

 It’s awesome to see the numbers decrease when you step on the scale and even better are the non-scale rewards: fitting into clothing, being able to move easier in your body, health check-ups with positive outcomes, sitting in a movie theater seat and fitting!  All of these non-scale rewards are victories in our journey to becoming happier and healthier for today.

 So what is the real price we pay for these bites, licks, and tastes, the little portions of leftovers we consume?  If we are tracking our food honestly we know there is a price for everything that goes in our mouths so now lets consider that when we go about our day and dip our finger in the cookie dough batter… what is the real price of that finger lick?  What non-scale reward will I be giving up for those uncounted calories, my health, my new clothing size, all the hard work I’ve done to become better, is it worth it? 

 Each of us has to decide with every bite we take what the real price is for eating the foods we eat, the portions we consume, and how it affects our outcomes and goals.

 Today I will consider all the bites, licks, and tastes, the unused portions of food, everything that crosses my lips and weigh that to the benefits I gain from sticking to healthy living.  For today I choose to live happier and healthier!

 

 

 

Ideas For A Spring Table

 Here's some great ideas for a spring table.  Fruit basket, melon bowls, tomato cups with cottage cheese.

Storage Bag Holders

These storage bag holders are a life-saver during food prep! You can find a link to order them for yourself on our Forward Reset > Resources > Favorite Products Page

         

Being Extreme

For many of us who overeat we tend to be extreme; extremely extreme at times. We will go to any length, use any rational to acquire foods that will provide us maximum joy for that moment we indulge.  Equally extreme is the guilt and shame that follows a binge and the extreme promises to never do such a thing ever again, especially when we know full well we eventually will. 

John is a grossly overweight man.  He overeats in binges and feels like most of his life is in control but will admit freely that he occasionally makes bad food choices despite his best intentions.  John will freely admit this because he can’t hide it.  It is blatantly obvious to all around John that he is overweight.  But John has to take to the extreme, he’s unwilling to admit he is not in control.  Sometimes John attempts to be in control of his eating by announcing he is dieting, when he fails he proclaims he has an undiagnosed health condition.  In this way, John attempts to show control even as he completely fails at controlling; extremes. 

Sally won’t spend $20 to join a support group or fitness club but she has no issue at all justifying $20 or more a week for take-out food.  “We all have to eat don’t we?”, she remarks when asked about her budget choices. 

John is extreme in that he must appear in control.  When he is obviously not in control, his extreme nature creates an alternate reality for John, one in which HE is in control but his undiagnosed health condition is the cause of failure.  Sally is extreme in that she won’t spend a penny on things that could actually help her but has no issue spending extravagant amounts of money to make sure she has her fix of binge foods. 

Of course there are varying degrees of both of these examples but I think most of us can in some way relate to these stories in their own lives.  We are too extreme, extremely extreme sometimes.  Most of our recovery from stinking thinking is going to be learning to cope in an imperfect world without the use of food for comfort.  Our food choices should feed and nourish our bodies, it should be tasty and enjoyable, but it should not be used to cope. 

 Learning to be perfectly imperfect is a major part of our journey in FORWARD RESET.  First, we must admit we have a problem, it is then we can look inside ourselves and exam our actions and intentions, identify characteristic about ourselves that need work, and begin the process of healing.

 Life is imperfect, we are imperfect and learning to cope with that idea is perfectly perfect.  We identify our extreme behaviors and work on allowing imperfections to be realized, we cope. 

 Living life happier and healthier, letting go of extreme behavior, finding ways to cope outside of food, and doing so perfectly imperfectly is the FORWARD RESET way!

Fences Serve A Purpose

“Don’t ever take down a fence until you know why it was put up.” – Robert Frost 

Step 4, “We have searched honestly and thoroughly into ourselves and examined the true motivations of our actions, thoughts, and emotions.” 

Treat this step as a mission of truth rather than a seek and destroy.  Some “fences” are there for a reason and maybe a gate into that area is more appropriate for the time being rather than ripping out the entire fence. 

In Step 4 we seek truth as to our true motivations of our actions, thoughts, and emotions.  Once we make a discovery it might take some time to work through what we discover and eliminate or replace what we find with something that doesn’t need to be “fenced”.  For now we can install a gate so that we may gain access. 

In Step 5 we bring a friend along, through the gate and into an area that is usually fenced off.  With understanding and love they assist us in understanding what it is we find there, how to eliminate it or change it so the fence is no longer needed. 

In Step 6 we are ready to accept help to eliminate or change our unbalance and in Step 7 we begin removing the fence that is no longer needed. 

What we fence off we do so for a reason, a self-protective mode we created for a reason.  To simply discover the fence and rip it out would be careless and leave us vulnerable.  Discover the fence, find the history of why it is there to begin with, change the reason for the fence and then remove it. 

Living life happier and healthier for today – FORWARD RESET.

 

Lentils

One-half cup of cooked lentils has:

• Calories: 140.
• Fat: 0.5 grams.
• Carbs: 23 grams.
• Fiber: 9 grams.
• Sodium: 5 milligrams.
• Protein: 12 grams.

There are a lot of ways to prepare them so try searching on the internet for recipes and cooking methods that work best for you!

Sugar in Salt?

 Always read the labels.  It is amazing where you find sugar!

Diet or Lifestyle?

I've heard people say, "I need a break"! Meaning they are taking a break from their food plan and just doing whatever goes. The idea is that after a break they'll return to their diet, stronger and more resilient.

What are you thoughts about this?

I immediately thought, if you need a break then you aren't living a lifestyle you are on a restrictive diet.

I think this is a major difference that needs to be recognized because if you are like me I can be very successful at restrictive dieting, I can lose tremendous amounts of weight, but I have struggled at creating the lifestyle. Something works for me everyday, day-to-day, one day at a time.

If what we are doing for our food plan requires restrictive food intake then ultimately that won't be sustainable.

What we want to create is a lifestyle. No bad foods, only foods that provide better nutrition and fuel to our bodies than others. We want to change the mindset of restrictive thinking to being grateful that we able to select any foods if we want but our desire to use food to fuel our bodies allows us to search for foods that are more nutritious and get closer to our goals.

Forgive, Reset & Move Forward; FORWARD RESET!

When we forgive we don't lose, we let go. When we forgive we don't condone, we let go. When we forgive we may not forget but we still let go. When we forgive we can move forward. Forgive, reset, and move forward; FORWARD RESET!